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Hidden Gold

Lance Witt — Mon, 18 May 2009 03:28:45 GMT

I have spent a lot of time the last few days in one-on-one interviews with staff members from a church I work with in Canada. I have been consulting with this church for the last couple of years and have passed a lot of these staff members in the hallway. We have exchanged the expected cordial greetings. I have been in ministry meetings with some of them. But I didn’t really know them.

These last few days have given me the chance to get to know them… to hear their story. To hear about their families, how they came to Christ, their journey into ministry, and their life-shaping events. We also spent time talking about their ministry area and the teams they work with.

I love sitting across the table having an unhurried conversation with these dedicated staff members. Having these conversations is like mining for gold. And the way you get to the gold is by asking good questions. Think of how often Jesus used questions to dig into a person’s life. Even more important than questions are GOOD FOLLOW UP QUESTIONS. It is often a 2nd and 3rd follow up question that discovers the gold nugget of insight.

Often when those of us in ministry ask people questions, they give us safe answers or the answer they think we want to hear. But if we will slow down long enough to actually engage the conversation… really listen… and ask good questions, we might be amazed what we will discover.

I have a good friend who is great at asking questions. I always walk away from our conversations feeling valued and cared for. Think about it… asking questions requires being unselfish. It puts the focus on the other person. Asking good questions says “I am interested in you… I want to get to know more than what is on the surface”.

So, let me ask you a QUESTION??? Do you need to start learning the “art” of asking good questions. Really work on this in the coming week. When you have the chance to have a conversation…

1. Slow down. Stay present and engaged.
2. REALLY listen. Give the person your undivided attention.
3. Work at asking follow up questions.

In your conversations the next few days… GO FOR THE GOLD!

Respect ... Pt. 2

Lance Witt — Thu, 23 Apr 2009 18:28:43 GMT

I want those who know me best to respect me most. OUCH. Would the people who know me best (wife, kids, friends, church staff) have the most respect for me? I started thinking about this issue of respect for those of us who lead in ministry and about 3 respect busters.

1. Dishonesty. The people closest to us hear us the most. They have a front row seat to watch our lives and our leadership. They see it when we are inconsistent, when we “fudge” on the truth, and when we exaggerate the facts. Dishonesty is a “slippery slope” and we need to treat it with severity in our lives. Tell those you lead that you desire to have complete integrity as a leader. Then ask for their help… any time they see you being dishonest, let them know that you want them to come to you. And, be quick to confess and apologize when dishonesty is spotted.

2. Ego. James 3:16 says “For wherever there is jealousy and selfish ambition, there you will find disorder and every kind of evil.” Where there is selfish ambition (ego), you WILL find disorder and every kind of evil. Those words are so true. But ambition is so seductive. It strokes our pride and fuels our ego… it makes us feel significant. But it is a poison. When it is always about “me”, the people I lead will soon begin to lose respect. And though we cloak our ambition in kingdom language, the people closest to us will sniff it out. If you really want to get “gutsy” with this one, go to a couple of trusted friends and ask them to serve as “ego patrol” in your life.

3. Mistreatment of people. One of the quickest ways for you to lose the respect of those you lead, is to have a utilitarian attitude towards people. They become positions rather than people. You start seeing them as key leaders, influencers, giving units, potential, and part of your network rather than Phil, Julie or Dave. Do you see the difference? In one paradigm, people are viewed and valued according to what they can contribute to our organizational goals. In the other paradigm, people are viewed and valued first as individuals who have inherent value apart from what they contribute.
It might be a good idea to select one of these 3 respect busters and commit to really work on it over this next month. How about it?

Respect ... Pt. 1

Lance Witt — Mon, 18 May 2009 03:29:01 GMT

Respect is a big deal to me. I am so blessed to have a wife who has always affirmed her respect for me. I can’t begin to tell you how life-giving that is. Through the years as a pastor, the most consistent message I have given to wives is this…”Your husband can do without a lot of things, but the ONE thing he cannot do without is RESPECT.” If you want to crush a man’s spirit just let him know that you don’t respect him.

But the flip side of this issue is that we must live and lead in such a way that we warrant respect. This week I had 2 separate conversations with people in ministry. If I had to use one phrase to describe the frustrations and cynicism they were feeling, it would be the phrase “lack of respect”. Both people had come to the place where they had lost respect for their pastor. They had stopped believing in the person that is their leader.

These 2 ministers are not newbies to church life… they do not naively put their pastor up on a pedestal. They don’t expect their pastor to be perfect but they do expect him exemplify the character and heart of a shepherd.

So, what do you do when you have lost respect for the person who is your leader? Do you hang in there and hope it will change? Do you leave? Do you just do your job and say “he’s not my responsibility”?

Personally, I don’t think there is one right answer for everybody or for all situations.

Here is a question that I have found helpful through the years Is the situation your in ‘good hard’ or ‘destructive hard’? There are times when God calls on us to make sacrifices and stay in a difficult situation. However, there are times when the situation becomes destructive… to our soul, to our emotional health, to our family. When you discern that your situation has become destructive, maybe it is time to consider a change.

In the next blog we’ll talk about 3 things that erodes respect from those we lead.

On Your Heart or On Your Nerves??? Pt. 2

Lance Witt — Mon, 06 Apr 2009 13:47:27 GMT

I recently talked with a pastor of a large church who was concerned that his staff was losing their passion for people. He feared that they were spending more and more time in front of a computer screen and less and less time in front of a person.

I’m sure Aaron must have struggled with this just like we do. I’m sure there were days when he came to the church, put on his breastpiece, carried out his ministry assignment… but his own heart was far from the people. I am sure there were days when he just went through the motions. I’m sure there were times he felt the breastplate was cumbersome, heavy, even a nuisance. Surely he could get the job done faster and more efficiently if he wasn’t wearing the breastplate.

There have been lots of days when I wanted to hide out in my office and not have to deal with anybody. There have been plenty of times when the people weren’t on my heart, but they sure were on my nerves. I suspect you know exactly what I’m talking about.

But I don’t want to stay there. I know that to be a faithful pastor I have to love people. Too many times I have had the head of a leader, but not the heart of a shepherd. The challenge is trying to stay healthy enough that I can REALLY love people.

When life and ministry moves too fast, the personal care and attention of those on our team tends to be one of the first things to go. Without even being aware of it, our mindset toward people can slowly begin to change. Instead of seeing them as people, we can begin to view them as tools to help us accomplish a job. Even though all vision is ultimately about touching and impacting PEOPLE, we can do it in a way that is very impersonal. Think of how ironic it is to have a vision that is about people that ultimately devalues people. Leadership that is Christ-honoring is never accomplished at the expense of those on our team.

Just like Aaron would carry the people of Israel before the Lord, I want to challenge you to do the same. One of the quickest ways to soften your heart toward people is to pray for them. Would you consider praying… by name… for one person God has called you to lead. And because I know how easy it is for this to fall off our radar, maybe you could take one minute and pray right now… before you go back to your day. May the people you lead always be on your heart.

On Your Heart or On Your Nerves??? Pt. 1

Lance Witt — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 03:05:00 GMT

I love this obscure passage tucked away in the Old Testament book of Exodus. It is a vivid picture of God’s heart toward people. It is the picture of a very personal God who puts a high premium on people. God wants to make sure the priests never disconnect serving God from serving people. I really believe these two verses from Exodus 28 are a challenge to all of us who lead in ministry. ...

"Whenever Aaron enters the Holy Place, he will bear the names of the sons of Israel over his heart on the breastpiece of decision as a continuing memorial before the LORD. Also put the Urim and the Thummim in the breastpiece, so they may be over Aaron's heart whenever he enters the presence of the LORD. Thus Aaron will always bear the means of
making decisions for the Israelites over his heart before the LORD.
Exodus 28:29-30

Whenever Aaron would get ready to perform his priestly duties, he would put on a breastpiece. On the front of this breastpiece were 12 stones. These 12 different precious gems were not for decoration. They were a reminder. Each stone represented a different tribe of Israel. Every single man, woman, boy and girl was represented in those stones. v.29 says that Aaron would “bear the names of the sons of Israel over his heart”.Every time Aaron put on that breastpiece and saw those 12 stones, God wanted him to remember the people. There wasn’t one person in all of Israel that God didn’t love or care about. And God wanted Aaron to authentically love and care for them as well.

It is interesting to me that in the passage it says that these 12 stones were to be the means of decision making. In other words, as Aaron faced ministry decisions, he was to ask “what’s best for the people”. I just wonder how often we ever take the time to stop and ask “what is best for our people?” If the people I lead are really “on my heart”, it can’t help but impact how I make decisions.Ultimately, leadership is not just about goals and projects, it is about people. This seems too obvious, but this gets violated all the time.

In the name of vision we can steamroll over people. But it wasn’t vision or a mission statement that was the reminder on the breastpiece… it was people.

I just wonder if God built that into Aaron’s ministry because he knew how easy it is to lose sight of this. And let’s face it, this is hard. In some ways it is much easier to sit at my computer or spend my time planning a ministry event. Really loving on people and investing in them is messy and time-consuming… but there is no substitute for personal care

God as a Commodity

Lance Witt — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 17:33:08 GMT

In the past few days I read a book called The Divine Commodity by Skye Jethani. Apart from the content, I mostly wanted to read a book by a guy with such a great name. But the content is compelling. Don’t read it if you don’t want to be a little uncomfortable with the way we’ve been doing church the last 25 years.

Jethani says “The reduction of even sacred things into commodities also explains why we exhibit so little reverence for God. In a consumer worldview he has no intrinsic value apart from his usefulness to us. He is a tool we employ, a force we control, and a resource we plunder.” God really has become a “genie in the Bible”.
His statement reminds me of a book I read sometime ago called The Trivialization of God.

We have taken the all-powerful creator the universe and portrayed him as manageable… a kind of glorified waiter. We have taken God who the Bible describes as the “all-consuming” fire and turned him into a pocket flashlight. There is no awe… no reverence… no fear.
It is no wonder that the world pays little attention to us.

It seems to me that we need to go back to our roots. We need to remind ourselves and those who sit in our churches that God does not exist for me. I exist for him. He does not exist to serve me. I exist to serve him. And, he doesn’t owe me anything. I am not entitled to anything. Prosperity, or health, or the “good life” is not mine to demand.

After 38 chapters of silence in the book of Job, God finally speaks. In essence he says to Job, “I’m God. You’re not. I don’t owe you an explanation.”

Job was put in his place and he appropriately responded…I take back everything I said, and I sit in dust and ashes to show my repentance. John 42:6
Maybe it wouldn’t be a bad idea for us to sit in dust and ashes and repent that we have turned the consuming fire into a consumer faith.

Sacred Becoming Familiar

Lance Witt — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 17:36:05 GMT

I remember as a kid sitting in church and wondering how and where my pastor got his sermons. I somehow concluded that God came to my pastor’s office on Friday and personally delivered that week’s sermon. Little did I know that many pastor’s are still praying on Saturday for God to give them a sermon. In my childlike view of God and church, there was a sense of mystery.

There are days in ministry when I long for that childlike sense of mystery and the supernatural. One of the dangers for those of us who handle the work of God everyday in ministry is that the mysterious can become mundane. The supernatural can become quite natural.

A sobering example of this reality is seen in the sons of Eli. They had grown up in church. The things of God had become common. In their case, familiarity had indeed bred contempt. Serving as priests had become nothing more than a job. 1 Samuel 2:12-13a (NLT) says Now the sons of Eli were scoundrels who had no respect for the Lord or for their duties as priests.

There is the potential to fall into the trap of simply “cranking out” services. This is especially true if you are doing multiple services every week. We run the danger of manufacturing a church experience rather than making a worship service a place where we truly seek God and meet him.

When the wonder leaves, it will not be long before cynicism and disillusionment will follow. Keeping that sense of mystery and awe is not easy, but I do know that paying attention to my soul helps me in this struggle. When my time with God is fresh and unrushed, I have a greater sense of wonder and awe.

So, how are you doing with this? Has ministry become mechanical, routine, and predictable? Allow your heart to be re-captured by the wonder and mystery of the great God we have been called to serve.

GRATITUDE!

Lance Witt — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 17:36:47 GMT

Every now and then we all need a good dose of “perspective”. A few days ago I was preparing a message from an intriguing story in 2 Kings 7. It is the story of 4 lepers sitting at the city gate of Samaria. Surrounding the city is the Aramean army and rather than fight they decide to just cut off the supply lines to the city and starve them into submission. There is a severe famine inside the city and the enemy outside the city.

Then, it hit me. That occasional moment of lucid clarity. There is a lot of fear and uncertainty and moaning about the state of the economy. And, certainly these are tough times and many people are suffering. BUT… compared to these 4 guys in 2 Kings, every person I know (including myself) is lavishly blessed.

These guys were social outcasts… homeless… jobless. They only ate when people occasionally threw them scraps. And, now there is NO food anywhere to be found. They live under the eminent threat of attack from their enemies. And, they have a painful disease that causes your flesh to rot off your bones.

I am blessed. I have a place to live. I have friends and family who love me. I have good health. And, for most of us, we have NEVER had to wonder if there was food to eat today.

The last few days I have been trying to practice the words of Hebrews 13:5-6
Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." So we say with confidence, "The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?"

I AM BLESSED

Play the Movie

Lance Witt — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 16:44:31 GMT

A few months ago I picked up Henry Cloud’s book 9 Things You Simply Must Do. The book contains 9 axioms of life and there is one I can’t get off my mind. It’s called “Play the Movie”.

The premise of “Play the Movie” is that everything we do is only a scene in a larger movie. Every action and decision I make today has implications and consequences for tomorrow and next week and next year. And, ultimately it is leading a final, climactic scene when my life movie will come to an end.

Here’s the problem… we tend to look at life in a “single frame” perspective. We fail to see that today’s frame is connected to the past and is charting a course to my future.

It is a good idea to regularly step off the screen of our movie and become the screen writer who is looking at future scenes. In other words, I need time to pull back from the grind of daily life… I need time to reflect and assess ... I need time to be quiet.

This is what Solomon encouraged in Proverbs 14:8 (NIV)…The wisdom of the prudent is to give thought to their ways, but the folly of fools is deception. Proverbs 14:8 (NIV)

Wise people “play the movie”… they give thought to their ways and honestly assess where they are headed. Here is a question I have been pondering… If I plot the trajectory of my spiritual life, what does the final scene look like? I’m not talking about our ministry trajectory, but rather our soul trajectory.

For longer than I want to admit, the trajectory of my spiritual life was leading to a final scene of burnout and disillusionment. By God’s grace, I am slowly charting a different trajectory today. When my public ministry fades and when my place on the ministry platform has been replaced by a younger leader, I want the final scene to be marked by finishing well and finishing still in love with Jesus.

Competition or Collaboration??

Lance Witt — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 17:38:52 GMT

Today I was thinking about competitiveness among those of us who serve in ministry. I do feel like there is some good news on this front. It seems that the walls of competition and comparison are beginning to slowly come down. I hear more and more stories about ministries and churches linking arms to work together, pray together, and be together.

But there is no doubt that a spirit of competition is still a demon that many of us wrestle with in ministry. It can be subtle and devious… but it is real. And, whether the spirit of competition is with another church or another staff member within the same church, it is always destructive. It hurts me and those around me.

Here is what I know to be true about competitiveness in my own life. It usually has to do with Outward Validation vs. Inward Validation. If I am honest, it usually has to do with me and my need to feel significant and successful. My own insecurity drives me to posture and protect. It drives me to compare and compete.

I want other people to know how hard I work. I want others to notice what I have done. I want to be recognized and appreciated.
Paul doesn’t pull any punches when he talks about how foolish it is to compare ourselves to others.

Oh, don't worry; I wouldn't dare say that I am as wonderful as these other men who tell you how important they are! But they are only comparing themselves with each other, and measuring themselves by themselves. What foolishness!

2 Corinthians 10:12

I am trying to learn to respond to competitiveness in 2 ways…

1. Stare it in the face and call it what it is. Confess it. It is ugly and does not serve the kingdom of God. It makes us look like the world and creates division within the body of Christ.

2. Bless others. Use the temptation to compare and compete as an opportunity to bless. Pray for other ministries and churches. Speak well of them in public and private. Find a way to do something that affirms and celebrate them.

Loving People

Lance Witt — Sun, 08 Mar 2009 02:35:43 GMT

Over the last two or three months I have not been able to shake a passage of Scripture that I read in my quiet time one day. I think it’s simplicity and straightforward instruction was what struck me so profoundly. It is a passage containing just two short verses tucked into the last chapter of 1 Corinthians.

As Paul wraps up his long letter to a very troubled church, he leaves them with some parting words that are so simple, they are impossible to misunderstand.

He says in 1 Cor. 16:13-14 (NLT) Be on guard. Stand true to what you believe. Be courageous. Be strong. And everything you do must be done with love.

Very simple. Not easy to obey, but certainly simple to grasp. When I read this a few weeks ago, I remember thinking to myself “if I could just live out these words, my life would be successful.” I am especially struck by the last challenge Paul gives. EVERYTHING you do must be done with love. The one non-negotiable of how we deal with people is that we must love them.

One of the things we would teach in our Purpose Driven conferences at Saddleback had to do with the priorities of a purpose-driven church. The priorities were in this order… Purposes… people… programs… property. Notice that people come before programs or buildings or property. That is certainly no surprise, but in many churches it seems that people can become an interruption to our busy schedule and ministry lives. I need to constantly be reminded that “people ARE the ministry”.

More important than my sermons or my leadership is how well I love people. As those who lead in church, we ought to set the stellar example of loving people. We ought to care about and treat people better than anybody else in the community.

For many of us, the desire to love and shepherd people is part of what God used to draw us to ministry. But somewhere along the way we got busy building a church and preparing sermons and managing budgets and writing sermons and we forgot that our higher priority is to love people.

This week:

Let's notice people
Look them in the eye
Take time to pray with someone
Really listen
Make it your goal that EVERYTHING you do will be done in love.

Marriage

Lance Witt — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 02:34:15 GMT

Last night we had some friends over. We shared dinner and laughs and talked about our marriages. We shared how we met, funny stories about our weddings, what attracted us to our spouse, and even advice we would give another young couple about marriage.

One of the pastors in the room mentioned that he had been doing quite a bit of marriage counseling in recent weeks. He said “I’ve noticed a common thread for each of these couples. They’re just not friends.”

His comment really stuck with me the rest of the night. “They’re just not friends.” I wondered “How are Connie and I doing with our FRIENDSHIP”? It is so easy to get busy with life and ultimately end up simply co-existing in the same house. By the way, this will really come back to haunt you once the kids have left the house. There is nothing like it just being the two of you in the house to expose years of neglect in your marriage. You didn’t mean for it to happen and your not quite sure how you got there, but your marriage is not in a good place. It ended up looking more like a business partnership than an intimate relationship between lifelong friends.

I don’t know where you are in this… but if you’ve been married more than a year, I suspect you know exactly what I am talking about. For those of you who still have kids at home, let me give you a head’s up. One day the kids will leave home (and that’s a good thing). And it’s really hard work transitioning a business partnership into an intimate friendship. Keep the friendship fresh and alive!!

Hard Conversations

Lance Witt — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 02:33:50 GMT

This past week I had a conversation with a friend in ministry. It wasn’t long into our conversation before I realized that he was trying to work through some disappointment. Something he had hoped for wasn’t going to happen.

As we unraveled his thoughts and feelings, much of the issue had to do with confusion. As we drilled down even further, it became clear that his confusion was tied to lack of communication. Whether intentional or not… whether true or not… he perceived being left in the dark.

It made me wonder how many times I have caused confusion (and hurt) in those that I led because I didn’t communicate clearly and honestly. This has been a tough growth area for me for many years.

I don’t want to hurt people’s feelings or let them down… and I didn’t want them to think less of me. So, I would often avoid having an uncomfortable or hard conversation. I would either avoid the conversation altogether or tap dance around the real issues.

Here’s the irony: in my attempt to not hurt people’s feelings, I ended up hurting their feelings more. In my attempt to avoid conflict, I created conflict.

So, in recent years I have been working at balancing truth and grace in my relationships and conversations. For me personally, the “grace” aspect comes much easier and more naturally. I have observed that my struggle is true or many people who lead in ministry. When you care about people, you don’t want to be a verbal “wrecking ball”.

But where I have often failed is in not delivering the truth along with grace. Part of leading and maturing is learning how to have uncomfortable conversations.

Solomon is right…
It is an honor to receive an honest reply. Proverbs 24:26 (NLT)

Obsession With Church Growth

Lance Witt — Fri, 20 Feb 2009 02:17:43 GMT

It seems like these days I spend a lot of time reflecting on our obsession with church growth… or maybe I should more honestly say my own obsession with church growth. I am among a growing number of pastors who are growing increasingly weary and disillusioned with the incessant push for “more” and “bigger”.

I find myself paying more attention to statements like those from the apostle Paul that Christ’s desire is for a bride that is “without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless”. More than the size of the bride, the focus is on the character of the bride. Instead of fixating on a BIGGER bride, maybe we should work harder at presenting a BETTER bride.

This morning in my quiet time, I was reading in Colossians. I was struck by the last part of verse 19.

"He has lost connection with the Head, from whom the whole body, supported and held together by its ligaments and sinews, grows as God causes it to grow." Colossians 2:19 (NIV)

The body “grows as God causes it to grow”. That statement is not license for passivity. But it squarely puts the ultimate responsibility of “growth” in God’s court. It takes the pressure off. And I can go back to planting, watering, cultivating, nurturing, protecting, and praying. I can create an environment where growth can happen. But it is imperative that I am clear on this one thing… the body grows as God causes it to grow.